Designer: Manikka
Resources: 1 2 3 4 5 6

Ich’m damit traurig. Wenn ich an es denke, es’s nicht die Risse, der von meinen Augen herauskommt, aber der unerträgliche Schmerz schmerzend von meinem Herzen. Wenn ich don’t Bock auf meine Fähigkeiten auf Volleyball, kann ich sogar auf als ein zusätzliches, kein festeres oder die Hauptleitung 6 Leute spielend schon übertragen werden. Diese wenige Wochen während der Feiertage, ich’ve ist gewesen fühlend ein wenig ruheloses und folglich ich war eingesetzt zu meinem Volleyball als je nicht als. Ich lazed herum, wissend nicht, was alle diese mich zu führen würde. Dann bin ich nicht die Hauptleitung fester mehr, diese Position ist gegeben worden zu jemandem, der 5 Jahre hat, ausbildend, nicht wie mich, der nur 4 Monate hat, damit weit. Vom festeren bin ich das U-Boot fester geworden und, der ob ich don’t weiter auf weiß bocken, kann ich nur auf als die Reserve übertragen werden. Ich will sicherlich nicht das. Und jetzt hat sogar mein Trainer den Eindruck den ich’m stellend keine Bemühungen in dies. Und jetzt statt der alten Aufgabe muß jener setters machen, gehe ich jetzt zusammen mit jedem und irgendwie einige von ihnen haben die Andeutung erhalten, daß ich meine Position verloren habe. Mein Trainer ruft mich nicht, die Einstellungsaufgabe mehr zu machen, und ich habe e Andeutung erhalten… ich habe meine Position als das festere verloren. Ich will wirklich meine Rolle zurück erhalten, weil ich nicht gut an meiner jetzigen Position bin. Zu schlecht mein Trainer wird beeinflusst, daß ich kann’t ist das festere mehr nachdem Sehen, wie schlecht ich während der Feiertage gemacht habe. Aber das’s nur e Feiertage, er hatte nicht gesehen die übliche Leistung, daß ich gegeben hatte. So jetzt ich’m gehend wirklich, hart zu arbeiten, und vielleicht wenn irgendwann Trainer sieht, daß ich’ve wirklich, er verbessert hat’ll dann gibt mich hinter meine verlorene Position. Irgendwann…irgendwie… ich weiß, daß ich kann machen es…weil nichts ist unmöglich…ich wirklich mich selbst in dieses einsetzen werde, und vielleicht ich werde wirklich es zurück erhalten, als gewünscht hat….

i m so damn disappointed wif u. u, dis person, should noe hu u r. it's not e 1st time u walked out on us. it's like e umpteenth time. everytime U were e 1 2 organise all e events. n at e last minute, i get informed dat u can't come. either wif dat stuupid reason of urs dat u got grounded "INSTANTLY" or u can't make it...stuupid asscuse. i gave u yet another chance. e 1st time was last year. u asked me 2 go out wif u...n i was like elated? cos u dis kinda mummy's or daddy's kiddo would actualli get allowed 2 go out. soo we planned for ages. it was like 2 weeks b4 e date. n on e day b4 it, u called me and told me dis whole lot of excuses. say wad shit or dat freaking bee-atch n nonsense. n well after hearin ur crap 4 ages, it's finally called off. yea. e second time....it's alll e same...all ditto. ok. u like somesort made me feel very extremely bloody freakin sad n disappointed wif u. so we got our results n went 2 diff skools. u did a lil beta den me...9 marks and gone to a good skool too. n so we kept in touch through e 6 months in totally diff. skools. it's owaes u callin me...cos i realli am busy wif skool work n i realli forgotten about u...sorry bout that. so it's e hols. n i start callin u too. soo u planned dis outin/date again. we talked bout dis 4 a week again. n e date was actualli today. n u didn't even call me e day b4 like u owaes did. u would call me 4 like 8 times a day...talkin bout it. n dat day u didn't at all. so i suspected sth. n indeed wen i called ya u just told me 3 words "i got grounded". dats it so i expected e obvious. its not e first time. n u didn't apologise. so i was like very damn freakin hell frustrated. just 2 words n we hung off. ok. n den i was like tellin my friend bout it cos she was oso goin. n u even told her to apologise on ur behalf. bloody shit. where e hell's ur sincerity? so u found out i was angry n called me and i avoided. n u kept callin so i answered. n u sounded so pathetic apologisin here n there. man. i'm realli sad n disappointed in u. i can't jus carry on livin wif ur tricks n lies. nex time it may b jus a fluke. but blive me. i would neva go out wif u again.

well today just had vball training which sux big time. usualli women only have pms 4 a few days or so but chew seems to have it everyday. it realli makes me wonder if he realli is a man or not. okay. today e day started badly. my father sent me to skool. ask him go back gate he still go one big round and scold me. he even wanted to walk INTO e skool wif me. cos i didn't wanna go by front gate, 4 fear of seeing SCOUTS. i dunno why but i realli hate scouts a lot. i just hate them, despise them and detest them. den okay when i was walkin 2 e vball court this whole group of scouts appeared walkin. shit. soo i waited 4 15 mins until they went to another side of the concourse but they were still there. so i walked one big round around e stuupid lake 2 go there. and man was i early. warmups. dis stuupid wo-MAN chew go ask us run 5 rounds around dat stuuupid lake. gr8. and i was 1 of e last. i dunno why but i can't seem to get my leg movin. mayb he saw us slackin while warmups so decided to revenge on us.

training was "great". e weather was once again scorchin freakin bloody hot. and these scouts kept on walkin and appearin in front of me. go **** and eat ur shit dawgs. den i had to bcum e stuupid setter. man the sun was blazin at my freakin eyes and i still had 2 "gang" the ball. and wads more bein a setter sux cos if u dun set well u hafta apologise and look sad. **** la. these grp of gurlies from our batch. man they were made out of sheep skin. so dainty. ask them to make a count they just seem to zip their mouths. den we can't even get a consecutive 50 ball. big time. n wen they dun hit e ball "correctly" dey jus gif u a remorseful "look" and give us dose poor thingy face. man get out of ur sheep skin ehz? soo training ended quite "nicely".

n wen i came back gues hu i saw?? my dear dear benji!! i was feelin so lethargic by e time i stepped outta e bus and walked in the gate(of e condo). so i was kinda draggin my feet wen i saw him. yea him. b****. man he was wif his faaather and sista. they were all carryin sth like a tennis bag. man why do all e boys dat i like like tennis? dis is weird. man he shot up. he's tall now... bout 182cm? wow. boys reallli change. den of course he slimmed down...now thinner. o ya he's sec 2 if i remember correctly. sooo shuai or hamsom!! man! he's gorgeous. and s i told ya i was draggin my feet and lookin so tired. den he was there. *wonder how i looked like* yea. we were like 10 metres apart and he dao-ed me! y do ppl like to dao and diao me? okay he dao-ed me. so of course i did ditto. fine man u stuupid b****. yea another thing. i made a mistake. he was not from boodok view or victoria skool. but hscs. go find out urself wad izzit.

den we were walkin towards each other. and now were like 1 metre apart? so again, like always all boys do, he gave me a "look" or would u say "diao" me. stuupid. but i love his glasses. tho it's kinda thick and black like minsi's , it made him look soo retro in e sense dat it's ccuuutee! man!! so i noticed him diao-ing me. and i diao him back. den i dunno y he began starin at me n laughin at me. n i was like giving him a look implementing "wads so funy? do i have shit on my face?" den it was all ova. his father's car was just soo near to where we were. so adios.. i walked to my house and he walked to his car. man he's hilarious. cute. hamsome. b****...man argh

den e rest of the day sucked big time...e end. no show anymore dawgs get outta ur chair and go some other place. ciao

man. i got beaten up. it's pain...wif e marks on my leg, hand and ass. luckily the marks are getting lighter soo i no need to xplain e hole shit if anyone asks me bout it. that's true. this time i didn't cut myself. i really GOT beaten up. and pain..yea excruciatin pain it is. and my hand reali hurts when i play the piano. my ass hurts like hell when i sit. my leg hurts also when i bend down to take sth or just move my legs. i realli got beaten up. by -i-shall-keep-it-secret-. but the marks look like cane marks, which obviously isn't.

today when i went for piano, there was this mark from the beating that was on my right hand. n since my teacher sits on my right, it would be very oblivious. soo i used a plaster to conceal it. and luckily the marks on my legs somehow faded. whoooo...what a relief. it sores. it aches..it arrrgghhhs...and my teacher ah...i think she really needs a watch. she started the lesson 15 mins l8er and ended it of course 15 mins l8er. waste my time ehz. so i went to kfc to takeaway some food. man, i was in the wrong queue..not exactly wrong but the cashier, who's like a trainee, not more than 20 years old, and name called JEREMY was like acting so slow..still wanna act cute to the woman who teached him everything. i waited 10 mins for my turn ok. and i can't switch queue cos i'll be rite behind again. he's stupid...give wrong change...and put sooo many things into one small plastic bag.. make the plastic bag that i held like a bulging ball. stupid jeremy cashier. act cute. den i walked out of kfc cursin and swearin words at him...and his name still was jeremy..u'll kno y l8er.

den i took bus 38, went home. and when i came out of the bus, gues who i saw. jeremy. not the cashier from kfc but my -old-tuition-friend-and-crush-. but now i find him totally disgusting. he was still the same, never changed at all, only maybe a lil bigger in size. yea. ridin a black bicycle and wearing white...which was what i was wearin. stuupid. and of course we could recognize each other..so he stared at me and gave me a l00k! man...and i dao-ed him. he stared. i glared. rhymes. yea. i daoed him. and soon he buzzed awayy...wad ya expect from a bicycle? yea...so dats why i was so angry when dat stuupid cashier, who was stupid, was called jeremy! i'm so angry with both the jeremys, one gave me a look and the other...stupid like shit! yucks!

sho juz came bck frm malacca. it sux big time. i didn't enjoy it at all, xcept 4 e -sleep-at-fg-room-as-i-was-locked-out- and stuff. and i realised a lot of things...whether gossip or realisation bout someone. it jux simply sux wif ppl that simply sux. sho if i were to rate it, it would be 2/10. the 1 came from the sleepover and the bus trip. and the other came from the shopping and spending of money. well i got my results...didn't xpect it to b s gd s i thought it 2 b. so well here it ish:
English Paper 1: 35/50 (highest kayst)
Maths: 94/100 (highest kayst song bo ms tan...everytime say me never pay attention and talk and play during ur class...how come get so high? how come so high? i prove to u tt even tho i dun pay attentn, i can do well and get highest so u'll hv nuffing 2 say bout me...get it dawg?)
Chinese Paper 1: haix...one of the lowest... 56/90...my chinese is the worst of all the subjects.
Science: 77/100 (so damn low...but top 10 or 8 i guess...de-prove 12 marks)
well i'm not trying to sho off but i'm realli elated wif my results sho i share the happiness kayst?

wel i bought a hole lot ov souvenirs 4 relatives and only 1 4 myself. the whole people smuggled chewing gum and all of theirs got confiscated...but not 4 me and sum of our friends! i was smart enuff 2 hide it rite inside the cabinet from their eyes' reach. kewl. teo shinn even put it directly on the seat...n neva got confiscated! lucky gal! i bought some keychains for grandparents and my grandad loved it sho much he straight away fastened it onto his keys. i gave my grandma, mum and auntie Karen a bracelet. things in malaysia r realli damn cheap. grandma put the bracelet on and i have yet to give it to Karen. but it was too big 4 Jenny (mum) to wear sho she'll find a way 2 wear it nex time. made a necklace 4 myself and it's awesome. bought a customade cup 4 daniel (dad) and i had to hold it for 20 mins as it wasn't dried yet. when the bus jerked...i would yell and scream, afraid of my cup for dad ... it was glass... i would like "aaaahhh my father going to drop!!!) wadeva. it was very nice and my father indeed was very glad and touched when he received it.

i went to fg's room 4 partay. got coke spilled on my clothes and were listening to ghost stories. all of tem wer sho scared dat dey almost cried. i was the only one bold enuff 2 open the door. and it was really eeky. when we were supposed to go back, i called umpteenth times to my hotel and nobody answered. i was so freaked out that in the end the 7 of us slept on 2 beds and i had only a thin piece of satin for cover. it was damn cold...maybe 14 degrees celciu? i slept like a log of wood ...so straight...for 2 hours. then in the morning went to bang and knock my door as hard as we could. until 30 mins, they finally opened it. couldn't use the doorbell as it was faulty! wad kinda hotel ish this? i wanna complain! doorbell, toilet flush and telephone was spoilt! fuck century mahkota hotel malacca! final verdict: i got locked out of my room. oh yea the bus damn cheapskate...damn damn cheapskate kayst.

didn't go 4 vbal on fri cos was too tired...couldn't summon enough energy when i woke up it was already 12 ...the time where i finished practice. sho i am dead. nex week ish my pre mock test for piano grade6 practical. and i haven't practiced it at all. homework: none done. armageddon.