Designer: Manikka
Resources: 1 2 3 4 5 6

INTERACT CLUB INSTALLATION - 310707 INNOSPHERE LT2. 5PM. OMG CAN'T WAIT. I KINDA LOVE MY CCA PPL NOW. ITS LIKE A COMMUNITY.

I CAN'T HELP BUT FEEL A LIL ANNOYED AT ONE OF MY GOOD FRIENDS. I SHOULDN'T SAY THIS BUT SHES KINDA GETTIN ON MY NERVES NOW. NOTE TO SELF: TOLERATE.

AND DON'T BE A POSEUR AND ACT LIKE PPL OR SOMEONE YOU'RE NOT.

I DO REALISE I TALK DIFFERENTLY FROM THE TYPICAL SINGAPOREAN THAT MAKES ME STAND OUT A LIL. I DUNNO HOW PPL VIEW BOUT THAT BUT SORRY, I CAN'T CHANGE MYSELF. I AM TRYING TO, BUT PARDON ME IF ITS NOT GOING TOO WELL. TILL THEN, KNNBBPBBSBSBKNNBCCB (LEARNT FROM CLASSMATE)- HOKKIEN WORRRXXXX.

SEE, I TOLD YOU. MY EMOTIONS ARE LIKE THE STOCKMARKET. EVER-SO-FLUCTUATING. IN ONE SINGLE BLOG POST I CAN HAVE 5 DIFF EMOTIONS. HADIHAHA

SKOOL SUX, BTW.

lets refer to 'she' or 'her' as my 'mother'.



i havent been talkin to her for 3 weeks and i don't think i will be anytime soon.



it started with a simple clarification about the use of my dressing table. she comes back tired, after a day of work and straight away goes to my room and uses the dressing table. come on, after 8 hrs workin outside, you oughta be a lil dirty and sweaty right? the use of my dressing table, as drafted by me, is that you gotta be clean to use it. afterall, its my dear dressing table that i got only after 2 years of waiting.



she comes back from work, doesnt even bother to cook and straight away uses my dressing table. its a matter of hygiene and respect for my personal possession (which is very dear). so she leans on the dressing table, starts scrutinising every pore on her face, flicks and ruffles her hair here and there. and all my combs and hair accessories are being subjected to every minute sebum and dead skin that falls off during your routine act. as you said, 'i can't see anything dropping to the table', call me obsessed or paranoid, but come on, its disgusting. sheer revolting. how would you feel after i came back from a long day of school, sweaty and dirty and lethargic, and start sitting on your dressing table chair and begin to ruffle my hair and flick my skin all around, which had probably been steeped with minute sweat particles, dead skin, and sebum? HOW WOULD YOU FEEL?



so a particular wednesday 3 weeks ago, i couldn't take it anymore. despite umpteen attemps in telling you to respect my possessions, i tell you again once more. 'pls don't use my dressing table when you're not bathed and clean. you have your own dressing table and if you use mine, you ought to respect it.' i told that to you in a soft, diplomatic voice. instead, you took that as a challenge to start yet another screaming hissy fit that we practically have everyday. you started raising your voice, telling me that you had no wrong to use my dressing table, paps paid for it, and that i was too obsessed with cleanliness, just like my father. you gave a hell lotta reasons and i could sense the tension. i tried several times to tell you exactly what i mean, but my attempts were futile. you misunderstood me. you thought i was tryin to revolt against you and start another war. after some time, this process of clarification ended up being the biggest war that we ever had.



you raised your voice, i raised mine. you screamed at me, i screamed back at you. you slammed the door in my face with such loudness that the decibel rating was well above 100. i opened the door, screamed at you once more, and slammed it even louder. the slamming continued for 15 mins. the screaming made my lungs felt like it was going to rupture. i made the first room and locked myself in my room. you continued shoutin despite reitering many times that 'i wont speak with you anymore. i ve given up on you.' if so, prove it! dont speak to me anymore! don't contradict yourself by opening your mouth and subjecting me to your shrill voice!



you have verbal diarrhoea. you can't stop once you started. you said you wont speak and i swear you did for at least 30 mins after you made that statement. i told you to stop talkin but apparently, you thought that was the red light for saying somemore. i tried to find solace in the claustrophobic and crammed place i had as my room. however i couldn't, as your bellowing resonated throughout the whole bloddy house. i coudn't take it anymore. i opened my wardrobe and took out a whiteboard marker and some really beautiful cans that i had collected from overseas. i stared at my oak brown door and began to throw those at the door. it was loud. but it felt great, like my anger was leavin my posessed body with every hurl. you heard it, of course. you ordered me to stop, but this sense of rebellion in me told me to continue, just like the verbal diarrhoea you had. i hurled and flinged and soon was overcome with fatigue.

then you said your trademark lines 'dont call me your mother anymore. i am not your mother and you are not my daughter. its my bad luck to have brought you into the world'. even though my once tender heart has been filled with these words so many times, i must admit that each time you said that, my heart felt like it was being stabbed with a knife. if you thought that those lines affected me, i admit it did. if you had the guts, do what you say! don't nato (no action, talk only!) if you had the guts to disown me, do it! don't say it everytime and pretend it to be a threat just to scare me off. your words are all a lie. you said you won't talk, and yet you did. you 'disowned' me, and you know what, im still in this estranged family! seriously, DO WHAT YOU SAY. DON'T JUST SPEAK EMPTY WORDS.

the last 3 weeks was hell, because i had to be subjected to your hissy fits and pettiness. you slammed everything, snatched the remote control and changed it to your channel WHILE I WAS OBVIOUSLY WATCHING IT. you did everything to go against me. you did even the slightest thing to proof your point. you folded all the clothes except mine, and threw it to one side. you washed all the dishes, but left mine at one corner. i began to realise, 'hey, she's playin a game with me. i shall not be a spoilsport!' so i followed suit. i got the hang of it, and hey guess what, if you can do it, i can too.

people reading this may relate to me and understand what i'm going through. but some may differ. you might think that im just a rebellious and uncontrollable teenager coping with raging hormones and trying to drive her to an early grave. you might think that what ive done in response to her was totally wrong, and that that was not how a daughter should behave in front of her. you might think that im one of the worst kids any parent could have, and would probably ask your kids to read my post, and never , ever learn from this 'beyond-control teenage girl'. im the total opposite to an ideal kid, so don't ever learn from me.

however, you would never understand how i feel. ive been living in such a f*ed up envt and controlling myself. ive been living with all these shoutings and cold wars, which sometimes turn really violent. ive been living with all your stupid temperaments, moodswings and hormonal imbalances since i was 11. indeed, it was your mistake to bring me into this world. it was your fault to bring a helpless soul into such a superficial, hostile and ugly world. you think that you are the most pathetic, the one facing the worst and that everyone should sympathise with you. but excuse me, lemme give you a reality check. perhaps you should reflect on yourself, and ask yourself why you are always stuck in a shit-hole, always gettin (as you said) bad jobs, bitchy colleagues, bad health and those stuff. its all prevalent in today's society. its not your bad luck, but the whole thing LIES IN YOU. you are the master of your destiny and if you face all that shit, maybe its your fault afterall. you just cannot cope with your life properly and correctly. seriously, everyone thinks the problem lies in you. its just that you have the inability to manage all that.

what ive said probably wont even be heard. why? its because you neved listen to comments or criticisms. you think you're the epitome or correct-ness. you're never wrong, always right. everyone's wrong and bad, and you're the best and most correct. stop being immature. even though you're my mother, but i think you seriously have a problem. try listening to criticisms, would you? but you never will, i know you of old.

pap's really confused and disappointed and angry with this cold war of 3 weeks. but paps, im not gonna give in anymore. im not gonna be like you, give in, and let her have the impression that shes right, once more. she needs to learn her lesson and know that she ain't always right. i had enough of giving in, my whole life revolves around that,.

now you give me the ultimatum. ive just heard the relayed news that you won't even help to wash my school uniform. i might try to use the washing machine, but guess what, if i am crazy enough, i would probably go to school with mouldy stinky uniforms, unwashed, or just buy a new set of uniforms everyday. or maybe, go to school without a uniform!

i am sick with all this thrash. my family life is seriously screwed up. apart from the wars with you, i also have to tolerate you and paps. i have to go through the screaming of vulgarities, the throwing of stuff, practically every second. i live in a milieu where there's no peace and harmony. its conflict, every second. you do all those stuff, utter all those expletives, and wonder, why is our 'daughter' becomin so bad ? why is she learning all the bad stuff? well maybe, if i told you the answer, howd you react? i learnt all these from you guys. you guys taught me all the vulgarities i ever needed to know. you guys told me that i was a bimbo, a bastard and all those stuff. you made me know that i was not treasured, and that i would never be a priority. you instilled in me the sense of insecurity, and that i was never good enough to compare to one of your 'friend's ideal daughters'. i was never good enough for you. you, yes, continue your hissy fits and fights with paps, continue, and see how i gradually turn into those unexpectable, deranged daughters that you thought it was your bad luck for having.

i love peace and hate war. if you continue to fight with paps any longer, how do you expect me to grow healthily, mentally? seriously, our family life is not healthy at all. you guys call me bastards and lament how bad its your fate to have me as your daughter, that sometimes, i really do wonder if i am your kid, afterall. i don't think i resemble you guys, now.

i hope this big war between her and me would end, but if shes not gonna give in, so am i. i AM SICK OF BEING THE LOSER AND THE ONE GIVING IN. I AM NOT GONNA BE THAT, ANYMORE. AND , my folks, stop quarelling. i swear if you dont' stop, i'll really do what i have been thinking of doing for a long time, since i was 10. that would mean committing suicide or leavin the home. that sounds cliche but i treasure my life too much. i'd vacillate over committing suicide because sometimes i just can't take it anymore. i thought of SO many things i could do to make me die. and i'd want a painless one. but look, there're so many other things in life. i don't wanna end my life so soon and not see how my life would be when i grow up. i would want to see myself being successful, having a good family i once never had. i'm up till there. you guys have the power, but i don't think i'll lose my precious life just because of you two. its not worth it. as for leavin home, im not big enough. i have no money and nowhere to go. who'd take me in? relatives, nah. friends? don't even think about it. i would leave home when i have the ability to.

we may seem as a happy, fortunate family. but deepdown, we all know that, thats just a facade. we aren;t the stepford family, the ideal family that you'd always thought we would be.


till then,
see me live in hell,

cherigabrielle

I'm from this class called 4 benevolence. and i think that contrary to what other ppl think, our class is really KEWL AND happening!!!.

i love my class and i wont deny or hide this fact. today , for the skool magazine, we took some pictures. (p.s. im at e front for all e photos, haha) here is one...

first random , ppl not knowing how to stand:

Etiketter: my hip and happenin class

wow we're almost past the third week of term 3 already.
time passes really quickly.

fleeting moments that hardly last.

soon it'll be the end of summer and start of fall.
as the name states, i think i'll feel gloomy too.
oh well

its obvious what the secondary fours are facing and i can't deny that we're slowly feelin the pressure.

apart from that.

since the start of term 3, ive seen to have distanced from xy and cass. i distanced from em maybe cos i always felt left out. and the emotional hurt of what happened towards the end of term 2 left quite a scar in me. however the connection between us just don't seem to be there anymore. maybe its me, but i just feel quite weird being with you guys. it just feels different. but dont' get my idea wrong. i still like you, though i don't know how you guys feel about me.

lately im beginnin to hang out with mians and yh. they are really nice friends and we always have long chats due to long bus rides. with them i feel really different. things are more open, we joke more and i feel less pretentious. they are nice people.

goin out to diff places of the east with mians and yh is really fun, but i do miss goin out with cass and xy as well, as they are really fun and nice friends, trust me. i have no idea why but we just seem to be like strangers nowadays. my mouth just can't open to strike a conversation anymore.

i miss my friends, but i like my current friends too. what am i to do?


anyway, enough of these

i gotta be strong. cos imma fighter!

to my boy:
myhotsexybaby!you'redabest!



till then,

i hope some ppl wont get the wrong idea regarding some ppl.

and MACDONALDS MILKSHAKE ARE DA BOMB XD

I LOVE TODAY'S DATE!


OH YEAH LIVE EARTH ROX! THE WHOLE IDEA IS SO FREAKIN KEWL.

OH YEAH SP OPEN HOUSE ROX. I LOVE SP!

the first song was ain't no other man. her voice really is da bomb. a lot were caucasians and there were many teeeenagers! we got a really good seat, right in the centre!

she started with 'aint' no other man'. and the moment she came out everyone went really high. it was quite hyped up.

don't mind that ugly head in the picture: and my fourtimes zoom aint that good:

my camera sucks, as it doesn't allow the videos to include sound. but the resolution's much betaaaaa! wasted. i wanted to bring my father's one, but it was seriously huge.

so i made do with my handphone. i took a video of every song. and i got 'warned' twice cos video and audio-taking were not allowed. and i swore i really didn't know until i saw the sign AFTER the concert. yeah i was quite scared cos e usher was quite fierce and adamant bout it. so i tried some tactics, heheh.

christina aguilera sang some of her older songs in different beats, rhythms and tempos that were quite unrecognisable initially. but i gotta admit. her voice is damn powerful!!!

she wore really sexy playsuits and dresses and she changed costumes quite often. her fav. color was white, i guess. and she didn't look pregnant at all (as what the tabloids have been sayin)

all her songs were grrrrrrrrreat.

there was also a mini orchestra and back-up-singers who sang equally well. everything was so well coordinated, sometimes the musicians and singers would dance to the beat with christina! the dancers were GODDAMnED HOT and they danced REALLLLY WELL.i want to be in her entourage too. ahhh.

and christina aguilera's very pretty.

it started well and ended well!

so we waited for muh folks to come fetch us and that was the end of one of the best days of my life!!

CHRISTINA AGUILERA, YOU ROCK BIG TIME!!! XOXOXO

hey people! the sommer vacation for singapore schoolchildren has just ended, but sommer vacations are all around the world now! now i should document another one of my father's amazing trips to two of the nicest and most picturesque cities in the world:


my father arrived at hamburg, which was 7 hours behind singapore time. so he suffered real bad jet lag. also, in european countries, during summer, the days are really long. sunrise starts at 4-5 in the morning and sunsets are at 10+ in the evening.

the weather at hamburg wasnt very good as there were constant drizzles and my father , wanting to appear cool, refused to bring an umbrella out. thats the problem with many teens now, too. the currency in hamburg is the euro, and most speak german or english.

hamburg is quite a compact city:



this is the view from my father's hotel window. at the foreground is the subway station:



also, i scolded my father many times as he hadn't taken any pictures, except of the port, whenever he went overseas. like, he only took 6 pictures of a cargo when he went to seoul! so this time, he promised to take pictures. including the bathroom:




this is his hotel. not very nice. but the cost of living is very very expensive. even though its one of the cheapest countries in europe. like, a burger costs sgd10!


some views of hamburg:




this is the typical subway station entrance:



hamburg. btw hamburg is in germany, fyi.





my father was walkin around when he heard a group of indian girls screamin - "rainbow rainbow!' so everyone went to take pictures. and he swears tis ain't any cgi. its totally real. i asked him if he found a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. and he gave me a you-are-so-lame look.

the rainbow's at the top right!




these pictures may seem to be taken around late afternoon, but they are in fact at 9+ in the evening!


okay, enuff of hamburg.

maybe it was a blessing in disguise, but this business trip was a flop because arrangements were not properly made and meetings were cancelled. my father tried to arrange some meetings but couldnt get to meet some clients cos of some screw ups. he suggested to come back to singapore since there was no use roaming around. but only business class flights were available and there were like sgd6000! so da boss suggested he just go to prague (czech republic), since the earlier flight was already booked. so off he went

oh yeah the flight to hamburg was 12 hrs. he took the klm airlines, food was horrible cos there were lotsa dairy products and hes lactose-intolerant. flight from hamburg to prague was one half hrs.


so he stayed at the marriot prague, right smack in the city centre. pictures of a five-star hotel:




since my father had nothing to do for 3 days in prague, he decided to walk around and explore the wonderful city instead of cooping up in the hotel all day long and rot. he combed the whole city by foot. and he walked reallllly long on his business shoes. lol.

currency in prague is the crown (kc). and weather was much better. it was summer, but it was quite cold, esp when the winds blew. he had no jacket so everyhwere he went, he wore a suit. hahahahaha.

views of prague:








roads in prague are very narrow and they dont use tar. they use cobbled stones. very archaic. there're electric trams everywhere. those buses that are like, hung on a wire.

prague has a rich history , very very rich, as you can see from the architecture and everything. sooooo beautiful. at least they conserve their history, not like singapore.




these are bricks that ppl purchase and draw their names on:




the predominant race in prague is catholic, so there're churches everywhere. but most of them have been commercialized and changed into opera houses or museums. pity.

entrance fees to either ones are very expensive. my father tried to save money by entering through the back door. and he succeedeed 3/4 times. smarrrt. and he said when he got approached (for a bad thing), he would just say "Nonononono!' and pretend to gesticulate in some weird language that ppl leave him .hhahahahahaahahhaha its smart you know.



those are real guards:


an empty street, all combed on foot by my father:







view of prague on some tower top:

my father has travelled to many places and i always admire the courage that he has. he is alone most of the time in his business trips. and he aint afraid to venture out! in these two cities, everyone's white and he can get singled out real easily. cos he said that he was prob e only asian man there. i asked if he was scared. and he said, why shld i be? he can be a sole explorer man, and i admire his guts. kudos to you!!!

and i love those beautiful souvenirs. expensive but awesome!!!!

so long, scenic europe!